How Can We Light a Fire When the Kids Are Driving Us Crazy? - Hardcover

Kreidman, having inflamed the passions of men and women in Light Her Fire (1990) and Light His Fire (1989), now sets her sights on couples with children, advising them on how to keep love and lust alive amid the draining and humdrum duties of parenthood, jobs, and home management. ``Ten Second Kisses''; red light bulbs in the bedroom; quickies in the garage while you and your mate take out the garbage together; confidential envelopes sealed with heart stickers delivered to his office--these are the sort of incendiary suggestions that Kreidman proffers. She includes testimonials from participants in her seminars (and plugs these classes, now franchised nationwide, as well as her ``romantic evening'' board game) and passes along their ideas (after dispatching the kids to a friend's, one woman welcomed her husband home wearing nothing but a toy holster, cowboy hat, and boots, with toy gun drawn). Kreidman's basic premise is that the kids will grow up and leave you, but your mate will, hopefully, be with you for life--so put your relationship with him or her first. She also contends that men need sexual fulfillment to feel emotional, while women need emotional fulfillment to feel sexual. Kreidman gives tips on handling the practical aspects of life that can damp down the flames, including child-care advice; budgeting suggestions so that you have funds for the regular getaways alone as a couple that she considers imperative; and strategies for getting husbands to share housework. Complete with stickers to put on your calendar to remind you to schedule a ``fireworks'' session, this isn't for the solemn, but should sell widely among people willing to try a little corniness and playfulness to spark up their sex lives. (First printing of 75,000) -- Copyright ©1993, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved.

This work is an outgrowth of Kreidman's earlier best sellers Light His Fire (Random, 1989) and Light Her Fire (Random, 1991) and the related seminars she conducts. Here she focuses on making time for adult relationships (especially marriage) while raising children and being a devoted parent. Kreidman emphasizes building a loving marriage by increasing opportunities for romance, sharing responsibilities, learning to compromise, and improving communication skills. Practical suggestions for rekindling passion and scheduling time for each other are included. Although children are acknowledged as part of the family, and each chapter ends with suggestions for being a better parent as well as a better lover, Kreidman stresses "the relationship between a man and a woman must be stronger and of higher priority than the relationship between parent and child." For public libraries where Kreidman's books are popular.
- Kay Brodie, Chesapeake Coll., Wye Mills, Md.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc.